The Future Has Arrived!

K, so that's a lame reference to a Disney movie (albeit a great Disney movie, 'Meet The Robinsons. Keep moving forward!) Anyway I stand by it.

So, lately, I've been pondering. On life, on now, on the future, and all that. I feel like this year, I've really got a handle on things. I know what I'm doing and I'm working hard; I have a path and a means. I love my job as a nanny. I know it is actually preparing me for the future, and it's matured me way past anything I've ever done before. I have the lives of five little souls in hands for thirty hours a week, which is a lot of stress! AND joy. Those kids are precious and special, just like all kids. I can't wait to get my hands on some of my own! 

(creep.)

So, now that I have my career all figured out, I'm thinking of all the things that suddenly seem like silly pipe dreams that were so important to me for so long. Like travel, mostly. It's less alluring now that it was even six months ago. Maybe I've finally grown roots! Or maybe my restlessness has been settled by the acquisition of purpose. I don't know.  There are only a few of the 49 original Bucket List tasks left in my heart-of-hearts. 

Hillary's Revised Bucket List:

1) See the Isle of Man, Ireland, and Yorkshire
     I'm rereading The Secret Garden (Francis Hodgsen Burnett) for my Grandma's book club (right?!) and am re-fascinated by 'the moors'. I still haven't got an image in my head of what they even are. It's like describing the taste of salt without just saying 'salty'; you just have to experience it. All these places seem so mysterious and Romantic, I ache to see them. It's the only kind of place I can image living away from my cold desert mountains. (I also want to visit Greenland!)

2) Have some kiddies
     I don't know if this one even counts, BUT it's what I really want. I want to have babies hanging off me and teach them to say 'thank you' and show them all my favorite books. There is nothing more perfect than throwing those kids around or watch them play and imagine... it makes me nostalgic, or achy, or that feeling that you miss someone you've never met? Like that.

3) Keep house
     Oh, I'm such a hypocrite. If I heard anyone else go on the way I do about My Future Home and all the homemaking skills I'm honing, I'd call them a Molly Mormon and lecture them on new age feminism. This task still has the sheen of betrayl to it, like I'm supposed to dread the day I have to do this, or look at it as a backseat to a big career or not worth my time or whatever. Instead I see it as part of my devotion to providing a positive, nurturing environment for as many kids as I possibly can, coupled with my fledgling philosophy of simplicity and hard work. There'll be no PlayStations or iPads or satellite TV (oh wait- no- ok, TV) in my house, thank you very much! Just, like, jump ropes and books, or something. Paintbrushes. "A penny's worth of seeds for your garden..."

4) Find fulfillment
     I took my nanny kiddies (the goat themes in my profession make me laugh and laaaugh!) to a birthday party at our cousins' house today and had a talk with my aunt about a Facebook status I put up about needing adults to talk to after spending aaall my time now with children. It's a little wit-numbing. I come home and start talking like the children. Not baby talk- I don't believe in baby talk, it stunts vocabulary- but with mushed up letters and confused words ('puter, 'sprinkles', choc'at milk instead of 'computer', sprinklers, and chocolate milk) (there are better examples but I can't think under pressure!) and also I yell a lot. So I need adult friends, stimulating conversation, books, or something. I'll figure it out.

So, there it is. My Future in four tasks.

The Garden Diaries

Day Two: Planning and Report

Today was one of hard labor! I finished weeding the plot on the side of the house and put in new dirt- everything is so super dry that dust was ev-er-y-where. I planted a bunch of seeds: bachelor's buttons, black-eyed susans, poppies, a whole bunch of wildflowers. After watering the whole thing (and apologizing to all the trampled strawberries) I think that one is done for now!

When that was done I moved on to my little garden in the front yard. Turning up the dirt to re-soil is more complicated down there because there are already plants in it. Doing my best to avoid all the bulbs and annuals in there I pulled up a lot of grass and put on new dirt. I can't imagine there wasn't mass destruction, though... I'll keep working before putting in any plants, I think.

Tomorrow we go to get plants! Yay! It's like CHRISTMAS!

Summer, Day One!

The Garden Diaries, Part 1: Planning and Report

"What time is it?/ Summertime/ It's our vacation!/ It's time to shout!/" -High School Musical 2

I'm out of school and home for three whole months! To pass the time (and since I can't find a job :/) I am wholly devoting myself to the garden. I started yesterday and am pretty jazzed about getting started!

    There is a little plot of dirt on the side of our house that we've never really planted in before because it  doesn't get good water. All that's there now is a few rows of strawberries that do pretty well (when we remember to pick them), a rhubarb, and last year's failed sunflower seeds. I spent a couple of hours in there pulling up all the grass and dandelions and some incredibly frustratingly deep-rooted clover. My plans are to put in some partial sun/shade wildflower mix seeds in there and really monitor the water that gets over there.

      Last year we potted some peppermint cuts from my aunt's garden in a box in the herb garden. I didn't think the plant had survived the car ride in the whipped cream carton and interment in a shallow grave (half and inch of dirt on top of some plastic plant carriers), but now I am glad we have it contained it in that herb box. It's thriving! I took out all the plastic I could and replaced it with mulch, and I expect that little cutting to really explode this year. Yay! It's super fragrant, which is awesome- when it doesn't mix with the also thriving chives right next to them. (I love those chives- they're yummy and pretty! but they make everything smell like onion.)

     Another pleasant surprise this summer is how well the blue lobelia I planted last year underneath the tree is doing. Again, I thought most of the little plants died last year, but this summer they are all over the place and spreading. They'll stop blooming before I get any perennials in, but it's nice to have some spring color in the shade. It'll look really pretty there once we've got the ivy trained up the stairwell. Also doing great are the vegtables (lettuce, beans, peas, and the tomatoes are already starting to bloom!) and the lemon thyme is going everywhere. The wisteria ivy on the front porch is blooming on last year's growth- smells sooo pretty- and by next year we'll have those purple flowers all up the side of the railings.

     Next up is to finish weeding the grass out of my mom's Bishop's weed (ugh ugh ugh) and re-soiling the front garden (my garden- my own, my preeeccciousss), and pulling up all the ivy ground cover in the beds around the front of the house and replace them with some shrubs. Mom and I are going to spray and kill everything in the mum beds in the backyard and start over, cuz it is a jungle in there. That'll be a big project.

Yay, summer!

A Few Of My Favorite Things, and a Few of The Not-So-Favorite Too

I Think of My Favorite Things...

-'The Lion King'
-BBC's 'Sherlock'
-the soundtrack to Disney's 'Brother Bear'
-any food with pumpkin and chocolate chips in it
-bipolar Utah weather (especially the epic thunder storm last night!)
-loving the old 'Red Dawn' and being super excited for the new 'Red Dawn'
-winning $50 for an essay I had to write anyway
-rediscovering applesauce 
-finally having a direction in my life (did you know you only have to be 21 years old to be a -foster parent? I am one year away from getting A FREE BABY!)
-having Harry Potter in my life
-snagging a shirt I've been looking for on sale!
-planning my garden to plant next weekend
-getting visited by home teacher for the first time ever 


It's good to keep track of these things. Cuz otherwise I get caught up in all the hateful things:

-finding out I have take more math for my new major
-finding out I have to retake all the math I've done since it's been over a year since I took it
-hating math so, so, much
-and also science
-knowing that all my classes next semester are either Freshman 1010's, math, or science
-stressing over not having a job for the summer and being all poor
-moving home to my parent's couch (no more bed! no more door to close! no more privacy!)
-the bittersweet of the end of the semester and losing my beloved roommates forever *sniff*


Life, you know? Barf.

All About Me

   I am a twenty-year-old sophomore at Utah State University.
   
   I like doing things, but I am really, really, bad at them. I love crocheting and knitting, though everything I make comes out messy and REALLY REALLY UGLY.  I have a garden at my parents house that I plant and kill every year. I like to cook for my friends and family, but I can't do it very often- I always say that I'm like Anne Shirley when she gets distracted imagining nursing Diana back to health after battling with scarlet fever and forgets to add the flour to the cake: "There's no scope for imagination in cookery...". Or the time she left the cheesecloth off the pudding sauce and the mouse got in and drowned? Like that.
     Lets see... Independence Day is my favorite holiday, because everyone is each others' neighbor. I like to read and listen to music, but only the music and books I've always listened to and read; I like TV, but not movies. I'm not easily intimidated or scared, but spook worse than a horse. I've had more panic attacks induced by ghosts than anything else.
     My mission here at Utah State is to get a BS in Community Services and a minor in History, so that someday when I grow up I can work with children that are wards of the state, in foster care or in refugee communities. I have a huge belief in the people of this world, with equal potential for good as evil. I am determined to live away from home soon- and not 'away from home' like my apartment an hour and a half away from my parents, but an airplane and a bus ride away from what I know.
     I love my home- Utah is the best, man. It's got everything- desert rocks and cactus, world-famous landscapes, snowy mountains, meadows of wildflowers. Basically all anyone could ever need. But I feel like there is more out there... I want to see Alaska, and Maine and Texas; Amsterdam, Denmark, and Austria; South Africa, the pyramids... and live in Ireland. I want to learn to return to simplicity, to be aware of what's around me and control it. I want to have a hand in my own existence: to create, not just to consume. I want to make a difference.

Freckles

Lately I've become, like, obsessed with freckles. I think they are the most interesting things ever. It's like leopard-people!

My Life At Twenty

I realized today that I've missed two prim-o blogging opportunities, Valentine's Day and my birthday. I'm twenty!


Here's my life, now that I'm twenty:

• I have thing about freckles- I think they're super rad
• I love playing sports, but hate watching them
• I am a pathological liar
• I think that 'Parks and Rec' is the best show on TV
• I think lions are the best animals
• which makes 'Lion King' the best Disney movie
• but 'Tarzan' has the best music
• but I also like sheep
• I really DID like The Civil Wars before everyone else
• And Adele too but I'll let that one go
• I spent this Thursday night in silence with the lights off so the friendly upstairs neighbors that invited me out tonight will think I'm not home
• I could never be happy living somewhere without mountains
• My future husband is a cross of Detective Lassiter from 'Psych' and Dr. Cox from 'Scrubs'
• I am so never getting married
• I am more excited for the new 'Red Dawn' movie to come out than 'The Hunger Games'
• I'm an air-headed shopper
• I'm a slob, '...not at all pleasant to be around in domestic situations' (-Daniel Radcliffe)
• My favorite possession in an 1888 edition of 'Sara Crewe, or What Happened at Miss Minchens' (later changed to the much more manageable title 'The Little Princess'.)
• My life is finally coming to order: I (finally) settled on a major- childhood and community development, FCHD- and am reinvigorated about school and life and yay!
• I still have no idea what I'm doing.

That's me at twenty.